Don't you just wish you could go to school to learn about parenting, find the answers, put your mind at rest and be the best parent you can be? Well you can!
Parenting is one of the most challenging things in life to get right, heck we don't go to school to learn that one do we? You can though, there are ways to show you how to guide your child properly to bring out the best in them, isn't this what we all want?
Fear!
When I became a parent I was in total trauma, terrified that I would get something wrong! For the first time in my life, I felt totally inadequate and I was a nightmare! I had this wonderful little soul who was dependent on me and I was scared to death! I worried about everything, from nutrition, which I had no knowledge of at the time, to making the right boundaries for this little soul that I loved so much, and bringing him up correctly!
Gosh this was the hardest thing in the world for me, we love our children so much, and it is the one thing in the world that we feel we will never forgive ourselves for if we get it wrong!
Finding The School!
The nutrition no problem, I soon learnt that, I remember listening to this guy teaching, the worst mistake a parent can make is to try being the perfect parent, how right was he! He said, "relax and enjoy your child, there is no such thing as a perfect parent and no such thing as a perfect child"! Ah easy said! It is true though, our child will pick up on our emotions, when we are tense and worried they then become upset, making everything even harder!
When I had my son (yes one was enough thanks) I started to read about child psychology, it was amazing, my regret is that I did not look into it further. With hindsight, I do wish that I knew then what I know now, then I would have learnt more at that time to give him the best opportunity of life!
What I know Now!
If I had those times again I would study everything that I could on child physiology. My Son is everything to me and I thought my love for him was enough and I did as we all do, the best job that I could! But love alone is not enough, we need to learn how to be a loving guide for our children, a way to bring out the best in them.
If I could go back I would learn all I could before having the baby! Preparation is everything, educating our self deletes the fear. Don't get me wrong my Son has turned out well and I am a very proud parent, but I know that I could have done better with more education!
The Best Lesson!
Our little ones make an innocent choice that may lead them to a difficult situation, they become confused and the problem escalates! We scold them and tell them that they did was bad, now they end up building their negativity, they become fearful and they think in their young mind that they have done wrong and they are bad! For goodness sake, they are infants learning the lessons of life! Now that they are thinking they are bad they will draw more bad situations! (What we think is what we attract) Why can we not learn to guide them gently to explain in a loving way that perhaps this was not the right choice that they made, when they understand this, then we can tell them, it is ok, it was a lesson for them to see a better choice, and form their opinion, this grows their character in a much more positive and strong way, now they feel proud they have learnt something, and more than that they feel loved!
Old School!
Most of us learnt the hard way, we get into TROUBLE, and we get scolded for it, this is how we learn! We can only be naughty when we know right from wrong, our little ones must learn this gently first!
When we teach our children to feel good about themselves then they flourish and are less likely to draw bad situations, but they don't get to choose their teachers or their class mates, they cannot say, "I choose not to go there", so how is it their fault that they get into all sorts of problems? We also need to learn how to listen to them, they have such young minds it is difficult for them to let us know when they struggle and so it comes out as bad behaviour, then we feel we need some sort of Degree to understand them! It is not that hard to understand their actions when we have education first!
So we need to learn ourselves how best to guide them, old school has gone, we must learn the unconditional love of being the best we can be for them!
New School.
The way we can learn is through child psychology, and if we can learn this before we have our children all the better. Hey it is never going to be plain sailing but knowledge is our answer!
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If I could go back I would, and I would learn everything there is about child psychology to give my Son the best that I could give him to prepare him in the best way possible to have a positive healthy outlook and experience of life! Parenting is so hard and we need to educate ourselves first! My Success to you, to all you deserve and desire!
Cheryl Fauvèl
http://mindandbodyinhealth.com
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